Does the bible give any Christian dating advice? Not really. Is there a biblical perspective on dating? Of course there is.
The bible doesn’t mention the word dating, and dating has been a culturally-set practice. In the bible we can read clues about the dating culture at that time. In short, fathers were involved in giving their daughters away to marriage. What happens before that can vary in each marriage. For example, some daughters may have had a friendship that developed into interest, before asking the father for permission for marriage; some daughters were introduced to the eligible bachelor and a series of cultural events may have taken place. I think the dating scene has similar dating practices, even today.
The first biblical perspective that I think most of you have heard before is to keep ourselves pure and to flee from sexual immorality (1 Timothy 5:22; 1 Cor. 6:18-20). This means making the necessary boundaries that may help us not be faced with temptation.
Another biblical perspective is that Christian’s should not be unequally yoked with unbelievers (Corinthians 6:14-16). A friendship is less intimate with different degrees of intimacy, whether Christian or not. I also want to add that we can be vessels of God’s love to people that God places in our life. However, we should never do missionary dating. I can say that it is one of the hardest things that I have ever agreed to. My spiritual maturity and emotions were on a rollercoaster. It was so hard to keep my focus on God’s purpose and plan for my life, while being with someone with a worldly perspective on life. I wanted to break free but I could not let go. Now, I thank God for the Christian friends that were bold and compassionate enough to help me break off the relationship.
An additional perspective from the bible is that two people come together in marriage and the marriage covenant is binding (Malachi 2:14; Hebrews 13:4). This bond carries a lot of implications about who we chose to make a marriage covenant with. Christians should take this bond seriously and that is why the process before marriage is so valuable. It is so important to know about certain qualities that we may not be able to endure or that we really desire from a mate. However, I am not talking about subtle qualities, such as playing with their hair too much. I am talking more about waiting a relationship out, as much as necessary, to leave room for discernment of warning signs for marriage. All things can be worked out when two people have committed themselves to loving each other, but the point of dating is to avoid bad surprises. It is not pleasant to discover a negative past or awful quality about another person after a marriage commitment is made, especially if you take the marriage bond seriously. It is wise to avoid bitterness for a future marriage.
The bible says that God will direct our steps when we trust in Him (Proverbs 3:5-6). God doesn’t give us any dating guidelines, but He has much to say to us about life in Him. The biblical perspective on dating is to live for God, no matter what we do (1 Corinthians 10:31).
